Lost your money-marbles?
You have if you’ve spent, or even considered spending, thousands of dirhams on something tonight that’s worth a fraction of the price– because it’s the last day of the year. Don’t feel too bad if you have. You are not alone.
But yes, feel bad. Because what were you thinking?
There is the "because I’m worth it" justification that includes having lifelong memories.
Let us hope they are good ones.
You stand more chance of achieving this if you reflect on things you do, as opposed to going into something – like a party tonight – full of expectant jubilation. And whatever you do, don’t ask yourself if you’re happy while out celebrating. It is a recipe for disappointment.
If you do not believe me?
This title is self explanatory:
"The pursuit and assessment of happiness can be self-defeating."
That is the title to a study. Does not exactly roll off the tongue, but says what it does on the tin.
The study was carried out in 1999. And still holds, I’m sure. Triply so if you’re spending the estimated Dh2,000 and more a recent survey put as the average spend, per head of those surveyed, on tonight’s entertainment in Dubai. The city came out ahead of London and New York as the most expensive place to spend the New Year evening. Is it worth it? Both spending- and happiness-wise?
Assume you earn Dh100 an hour for seven hours a day minus breaks, five days a week, into 52 weeks a year, assuming you are not self-employed and therefore still earn when you are on holiday.
That works out to Dh182,000 a year, or just over Dh15, 000 a month. If this is what they earn, then those surveyed in Dubai are spending, on average, 20 hours of work-life on food and entertainment tonight.
Truth is that they are spending much, much more – takeaway pay is whatever you’re paid, minus the cost of getting to and from work. Including transport, clothes, food – the list is long.
If the money is gone, it is gone. Do one thing though: calculate how many hours of your earning life you just obliterated.
In the morning of the first day of the year, write down whether it was worth it. This is when you can ask yourself if you feel happy about how New Year’s Eve goes.
The 1999 study found what many of us know – that having high expectations for happiness may encourage us to make unfavourable comparisons between what we experience and an imagined, ideal state of happiness, which can lead to frustration.
Of course it might not apply to you – you lucky, happy person.
Another thing that many do at this time of year is buy things for friends and loved ones. Stop.
The frenzy is disconcerting. I see people of all persuasions inventing reasons to buy things. Anything. Just something.
Great if it is a coveted something, or if it is needed. The truth is, it is not.
So this year I am gifting on behalf of others – whether they like it or not. My chosen people get a framed photo and a poem I wrote about the gift. The photo is of a toilet somewhere out there in the world – that their smallest room has been twinned with. You can read the poem on my blog. Yes, my gift is twinning people’s toilets.
I mean, let’s get real.
What do you buy someone who has everything. No. Wrong way around: what do you gift someone who lacks nothing.
You give them something to think about – and gift others through them. That’s my recipe. Twinning toilets is my current thing.
Back to tonight’s celebrations. Researchers say their findings about New Year’s Eve aren’t a call for abandoning parties and reflection, just for managing expectations and focusing on savouring your experiences while you’re having them.
I’ll add: and not blowing your entertainment budget.
Don’t skimp. Do ring in the new year in style. Just make sure it’s worthwhile – not futile.
Nima Abu Wardeh describes herself using three words: Person. Parent. Pupil. Each day she works out which one gets priority, sharing her journey on finding-nima.com
source :The National
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