15 ways to be happy

It's official: Having a purpose in life can actually help you live longer. Apparently those who have one - which could range from something ambitious like scaling Mount Everest to a relatively simple goal like reading a set of books - are likely to live longer than those who don't, according to researchers at the Rush University Medical Center in Chicago. Ask anybody and they'll tell you setting a goal is relatively easy. It's investing the time and effort towards achieving it that's the tricky part. And it is here that the importance of emotional and mental health is most crucial - it's no secret that people who are emotionally stable and healthy can tackle life's challenges, bounce back from adversity and build and maintain strong personal and professional relationships. A healthy mind boosts your mood and helps you savour life to the full. Also important to your motivation is your physical well-being, because a healthy body promotes a healthy mind. Recognising the importance of these ideas, Friday asked five experts to suggest ways to have a healthy, wholesome and fulfilling life. Follow their 15 top tips for a better life starting today. For better psychological health Mary John Isaac, clinical psychologist, Dubai Community Health Centre 1. Strengthen your relationship with your loved ones. For this, the first thing you need to do is be honest with yourself and recognise/be aware of your strengths and weaknesses. For instance, you could be a loving father who cares for his child (strength) but one who loses his temper easily (weakness) and screams at him/her for a minor misdemeanour. This could make your child apprehensive and afraid while in your presence. If you pause to think about why the child is behaving in a certain way, you will be able to zero in on your weakness. Once you identify your weakness, you can start working on them. For example, you can find ways to control your anger - count to ten, take a deep breath, pause for a few seconds - which will dissipate the negative emotion. 2. Be clear in your communication. Don't send your friends or family conflicting messages that will leave them confused about your intentions or expectations. For example, a mother might tell her son that she wants him to be independent, but also make it clear that she'll love him more if he depends on her. To avoid misunderstandings, you need to have clarity of thought and you must figure out what you need to say before speaking to avoid any misunderstanding. In the above example, the mother can encourage her son to be independent but add that she will be always available if he is seeking advice on any major issue in his life. 3. React positively to negative emotions. It can improve your professionalism and help build healthy relations not just in the workplace, but in your personal life as well. Don't feel let down by cynicism or sarcasm; instead stay alert for opportunities by believing in your unique qualities and accepting your weaker areas. Acceptance is the first step to healing. For instance, if your boss criticises your work, don't jump to conclusions and believe that he/she is out to put you down. Stop and consider whether the mistake is truly yours. Accept that maybe you had not done the best you could. It's also important to remember that the criticism is of your work and not you. Begin to look at criticism as a way to improve yourself; consider it as advice for improvement and as a recommendation. The flip side of your work or your attitude not being criticised is you could falling into the trap of complacency, which could leave you stagnant in your professional and personal life and unwilling to look beyond what you think is right or good. To help realise your goals/dreams Susan Castle, Dubai-based life coach 4. Make a plan of action for the next six months. The more detailed your plan is the more likely you are to succeed. But plan to do only six things every day towards your goals, that way you don't stress yourself out but you can keep your momentum going. When the going gets tough, and it will, you will have a detailed plan so you know exactly what your next step should be. 5. Make yourself a vision board and carry a picture of it with you wherever you go. Go through magazines and trawl the internet for images of things you really want in your life. Now cut/print them out and stick them on a big piece of board. You can add words that really work for you too. Place this board above your desk or in an area where you'll always see it. You could even take a photograph of the board and set it as wallpaper on your phone/computer, print out a small copy and keep it in your purse and make a copy to put on your bathroom mirror so you see it first thing every morning and last thing every night. This will help you stay focused on realising your dreams and goals. 6. Set big goals that really excite you. A great goal is one which makes you excited but nervous in equal amounts. It could be, for instance, "by September 2012 my book will be published and on sale". You don't have to know how to achieve it now; you will learn what you need to learn along the way. Remember the real purpose of a goal is personal growth - it is meant to stretch you and challenge you to do new and exciting things. Have at least one outrageous goal that is so big and so ‘out there' that it makes you laugh to think about it. To get your eating plan on track Carole Holditch of Good Habits (www.goodhabits uae.com) offers one-to-one guidance, advice and support to people who are looking to lose weight. 7. Plan your meals before they happen. Eat in - pack lunches and snacks if you are a career person, and make the commitment to eat right. Very often, meals that are grabbed from supermarkets or from fast-food outlets are high in fats, salt and calories which means they're unhealthy and pack on the kilos. Take a little time to pack a healthy lunch or snack box at home and you won't have to spend extra hours burning the fat off in the gym. 8. Brush your teeth right after dinner to remind yourself you are finished eating for the night. That will stop you from reaching for the extra dessert that's on the table or polishing off the leftovers - the easiest way to put on unnecessary kilos. 9. Try eating five to six small frequent meals as opposed to three large ones. If you wait too long for a meal, by the time the food comes, you will be starving and will not be able to control yourself, resulting in overeating. Eating smaller meals more often helps keep you full, and lets you be in control of how much you eat. To improve your well-being Dr Chandy George, Ayurvedic lifestyle consultant, Balance Café and Wellness Club, Dubai 10. Be active. Avoid sitting in front of the TV for extended periods of time as you're more likely to reach for unhealthy snacks. Use your spare time to exercise or engage in household activities. Make it a habit to walk more often. You might think that you don't have time, but you can go for a walk while talking on the phone. Experts say you use approximately 15 per cent of your total energy each day moving, excluding training or exercise. So try to include as much activity into your day as possible. 11. Eat and drink healthily. According to Ayurveda, almost all health problems start from the stomach. If that is in perfect order, all is fine. So, to ensure good digestion and avoid health issues, don't skip meals, and eat on time. This is the golden rule of healthy living. Indulge in home-cooked meals as far as possible. Have a moderate mix of foods that offer the six tastes - sweet (sugar), sour (lemon or lime), salty (salted nuts), bitter (bitter gourd), pungent (spicy curries) and astringent (cranberry juice). Switch to healthy snacks like fruits, berries and nuts, and cut down on sugary and fried food. When you wake up in the morning, have a glass of water with ginger and honey as it cleans the digestive system and flushes out toxins. Consume at least two to three litres of water every day. 12. Sleep well and just enough so you wake up energised and refreshed. How do you know how much is enough? If you feel tired when you wake up in the morning after more than eight hours of sleep, you need to reduce the duration, as too much is as tiring as too little. Just the right amount makes you spring out of bed. Pamper yourself. Go for a spa treatment. It can raise your spirits and revitalise both body and mind. Try not to take life too seriously and look at the positive side of life. It helps to share your issues with people who listen to you. Also, know your risks and analyse how your lifestyle affects your health. This can go a long way to help you make the right changes to your lifestyle. To improve your fitness regimen Mark Botha, group sales and marketing director at Fitness First Middle East 13. One important fitness fact is that more is not always better. You shouldn't strain your muscles by working out for hours on end. Exercising too much can actually weaken the immune system. Research has found that during intense physical exertion, the body produces certain hormones that temporarily lower immunity. According to research conducted by David Nieman, PhD, a health and exercise science specialist in Boone, North Carolina, putting your body under frequent, mild doses of stress due to exercise improves it over time. But over-exercising apparently has the opposite effect. Dr Nieman found 90 minutes or more of continuous activity at moderate to high intensity weakens the immune system, making you more prone to illness. The effect can last up to 72 hours. 14. Work hard for a strong abdomen. Having a strong core is essential. Make sure you incorporate core strength training into your workouts. Your gym/fitness instructor will be able to help. 15. To reduce soreness after workouts, try going on Power Plate machines. These machines (available at several fitness centres in the UAE) stimulate the body's natural response to vibration, transmitting waves of energy throughout the body enhancing overall performance in sessions as short as 15 minutes a day. You could also do stretching exercises to cool down after a strenuous workout.