Maybe you are an alcoholic

If you enjoy more than the occasional drink and feel it's perfectly fine, think again. Experts classify such people as High-Functioning Alcoholics They are all around you. For all you know, they might be among your friends, family, acquaintances or colleagues and until you discover their best-kept secret, you wouldn't even know they are alcoholics. High-Functioning Alcoholics or HFAs, a fast-growing urban concern, are masters at appearing completely normal and leading double lives - efficiently managing their jobs, studies and relationships on one hand yet inwardly, remaining as compulsive as stereotypical alcoholics. They are good workers, good parents, good spouses, good employees and so good at stealth that they convincingly carry out their roles and duties. However, a person's relationship to alcohol and their emotional dependence on it is what defines an alcoholic. Not the image they project to the outside world. Pritam Datta, Founder, Living Free Foundation rehab centres, says most often, HFAs walk the tightrope until a close encounter with death or a life-changing event makes them lose something precious or blows their cover. "HFAs are least likely to seek treatment because they are in absolute denial. Their ego won't let them acknowledge it because they consider seeking help a sign of weakness. So the problem with identifying and helping HFAs is that they often don't meet the counselor's criteria for alcohol abuse, as they have managed to keep their personal and professional lives unaffected by it." As many HFAs succeed or overachieve in their lives, denial comes as easily from themselves as it does from their co-workers, family and friends. Sarah Allen Benton, a reformed American HFA, in her book Understanding the High-Functioning Alcoholic emphasises on how people in powerful positions are often the hardest to detect and help. "That is because they tend not to be closely supervised at work, they are assumed to be able to deal successfully with the pressures of their jobs, their high pay enables them to escape the financial consequences of excessive drinking, and they see drinking as their reward for hard work." Psychiatrist Dr Yusuf Matcheswala says, "HFAs need their regular drink; at the touch of 9 pm every night; or look forward to drinking four-five times a week. Today's generation of work-hardparty-harder are increasingly falling into the HFA space. As they nurture this habit clandestinely, they are unaware of how their bodies are developing scary complications - liver and gastrointestinal problems, cholesterol issues, cerebral dysfunctionality, diabetes, sexual and sleep disorders. "Besides, the HFA's alcohol-tolerance level goes up and as he must drink more to feel the high, he further damages his body. His body is basically a disaster waiting to happen," adds Matcheswala. A classic characteristic of HFAs is that the evening they have got their salary, they are at a bar, says Datta. "When they have a hangover, they will down a shot in the morning, which will offset it and fix them good to step out and face the world. Their logic is - I'm doing well for myself and my family, so what is the harm if I reward myself with drinks? But they are at as much risk to themselves and others' lives as a raging alcoholic is, because they may fall off the train or the bus or drive and be a menace on the streets." Matcheswala gives an instance of one of his patients - a 35-yearold well-to-do computer dealer who couldn't do without his daily drink. "He had kept it a secret from everybody and his excuse was that alcohol relaxes him and helps him have a good night's sleep. I told him that he was administering himself a very costly sleeping drug and it was only a matter of time before he must pay its price with his health and well-being." So how do you help the HFA out of his or her misery? Datta says that while family or friends may try to push the HFA for treatment, the task is to tackle the alcoholic's denial and resistance to it. "Don't confront the HFAs. When they are sober, talk to them, explaining how their drinking hurts them and their dear ones. Drop a few examples of how it is adversely affecting things. Be supportive and persuasive." You are an HFA if... - You set drinking limits for the day or the week and cannot adhere to them - You obsess over drinking -when and where and who you will drink with next - You use alcohol as a reward - You laugh about it to dissociate yourself from the 'alcoholics' - You always finish alcohol, even if it is your friend's glass - You drink more than others and still don't get hit - You socialise with heavy drinkers - You experience blackouts, unable to remember what took place during a drinking bout - When you drink, you behave in ways uncharacteristic of your sober self - Drinking is a large part of your life Case study of HFA Ashish Patil, 32, Electricity "I was in the tenth standard when I had my first drink. I haven't been able to forgo my glass of whisky or vodka since then. For a few years, I would drink surreptitiously to avoid getting caught by my parents. But once I began working, my drinking became an extension of my work hours; the 9-to-5 job, then meeting friends at a bar in the evening and drinking for twothree hours before going home. Eight years ago, I got married and we have a son and a daughter. My wife obviously knows about my habit because of the smell, but not once have I ever misbehaved with her or the children or with anybody else in my drunken stupor. It has been 15 years now that I have my four glasses of alcohol every day without fail. Nothing has changed...I was 55 kgs then and I am 56 kgs now. I haven't had any serious health problem yet and I never report late to work. Nobody in the office or elsewhere knows of this. But I know this habit is fatal in the long run and I have unsuccessfully tried quitting it on three occasions. I am helpless. I guess some drastic event in my life may help me give it up."